I’ve met some pricks in my time but you are the fucking cactus.

(via lovemyfeline)



Do you ever wonder about how an author would describe you in a novel? Not only your appearance but the way you talk and laugh and hold yourself and all the expressions on your face?


(via peekingtitan)



i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.

This is genius

(via joshpeck)

Boy im interested in who is interested in me: *likes another girls selfie*

Me: oh u want to play games? *fucks someone else*

(via fawun)

  July 28, 2014 at 11:22am
via fapngo